Lahoud: Fly Me to Khartoum
You are Emile Lahoud, President of the Republic of Lebanon. The majority in parliament has vowed to cut short your illegitimate, if not illegal, term of office. Your popularity is near zero. The parties and individuals who want you to stay, want it for all sorts of reasons, but respect for your person is nowhere on the list of said reasons. Furthermore, your country is facing dire circumstances. What to do?
You decide to go to a meeting of the Arab League of course. (That's the annual meeting of the Arab League March 28, in Kartoum, Sudan.)
Why? Because the only thing you can do is try to freeze time. And what better way to do that than to go to an event where NOTHING happens, NOBODY cares what happens, NO ONE registers what happens other than some overpaid self-important League bureaucreep.
By the way, if anyone can think of anything, ANYTHING, that the Arab League ever did to improve the lot of a single Arab anywhere, please do inform me. Of course, Arab League ambassadors, employees, and other bloodsuckers don't count.
It should also be noted that Lebanon will NOT be on the agenda of the meeting (L'Orient-Lejour, link good one day).
That is standard operating procedure at League meetings. When an issue is contentious, as are all important issues, it will not be on the agenda.
The OASL, Official Arab League Sweeper, will immediately sweep it under the rug. That is, of course, after collecting his salary which is inversely proportional to his competence level. It goes without saying, expensive gourmet meals and hotels are also part of the deal here.
Back to Emile-the-Useless. He claims today that there is a plot backed by the US and France to oust him from office. Well maybe there is, except this time , also and still, an overwhelming majority of Lebanese want him out. That's the same Emile-the-Useless who was not bothered by the "plot" or "coup" to extend his term, after a few Syrian phone calls and several death threats to the 128 MP-voters involved in his "extension/election".
Does Emile believe what he says or not? I am not sure which option is worse, but will contend that it does not matter.
If he doesn't believe his own words, then he's a liar, obviously up to no good, and intent on pursuing a personal and/or foreign agenda. In that case, he needs to be removed from office ASAP.
On the other hand, if Emile-the-Useless actually believes what he says: defending the constitution, standing against coups, protecting Lebanon from (??), then that would clearly put him in the category of the imbeciles. In that case, he should be removed even faster.
Here's hoping that the traitor-clown is gone by March 28, or sooner.
PS. Lest there be any confusion. I would be prouder if Bozo the clown represented Lebanon at that meeting. However, faithful readers already know, I don't care who represents us there, and would rather see an empty chair under Lebanon's flag.